What To Do If You Have To Much On Your Plate
Hi - it’s me… Jen, you know the one that has too much on her plate.. yup me!
Anyone resonate with this? If so, this blog is for you….
The thing about me, is I’m always doing something. In addition to coaching, I have a few jobs as a mental health consultant, therapist… I’m a wife, foster mama, dog mom, daughter, sister, friend and the list goes on.
I’m obsessed with learning (PS… Just registered for a new course to get certified in Sleeps, Stress Management and Recovery!), renovating a farmhouse and a partridge and a pear tree.
To say I have a lot on my plate might be an understatement. I do this all by choice, a conscious choice. Not just because I know I can do it (I’m good at being busy) but because I’m passionate about everything I do and I truly enjoy it.
Some may look from the outside and think I have it all together.. but NOPE! Reality check.. I don’t always have it together. Confession - I’ve been very overwhelmed the last few weeks. Am I still doing what I need to.. ehhh for the most part yes. Am I getting my work done.. yup. Am I seeing all of my clients.. yes. But you know what started to fall away… my self care.
Something that is the most important to me, one of my priorities, started to get shifted to the back burner. I had too much on my plate and I didn’t know how to manage it all.
I can’t be superhuman all of the time…
Taking on too much is not something we should do on a consistent basis - we need to recognize when we have a little too much on our plate and make some small changes. When you have too much on your plate, you and your family can experience stress and likely you will have no time or energy for yourself… this was exactly what was happening to me.
What Does Having Too Much on My Plate Mean?
Having too much on our plate means we have too much going on, we are too busy and maybe not productive. We are dealing with a lot and likely worrying or having anxiety about a lot, because we are experiencing a lot. We are likely trying to do it all and be it all.
This is very different than having a fulfilled and active life, having a full plate often means there is stress and a need to cope attached to it. You can have a career, a family, children and a social life and this all feels great.. however when you add on library night or an extra class or shift… this can bring you into a new category of overwhelm.
How Do You Know If You Have Too Many Things On Your Plate?
Signs to watch out for that tell you maybe you have too much on. your plate:
You’re not sure what’s most important
You find yourself task switching (going from one task to another)
Being on time is struggle (to places or with deadlines)
You feel guilty (mom guilt etc)
You find yourself saying no to the things you actually want to do (usually accompanied by saying yes to the things you don’t want to do)
There’s something missing from your life
It's difficult to focus
You’re not getting good, quality sleep
Ask Yourself…Do I Have Too Much On My Plate?
WHAT DO YOU DO IF YOU HAVE TOO MUCH ON YOUR PLATE?
OK… Now I Know I have Too Much On My Plate, What Do I Do Now?
5 Actionable Steps to Take When There’s Too Much On Your Plate
Invest In A Great Planner and Learn To Prioritize
I use the best planner in the game (if you need the link let me know!) - it focuses on tasks but also self care, prioritizing, gratitude, decluttering - all of the stuff that usually falls off of our list, you can keep in one place. Plan to use the first 20 minutes of each Monday morning to plan your week or just one day at a time (whatever works best for you). Start with your B Tasks - those meetings and appointments that are set in stone. Then go back in fill in your A Tasks - ensure that you are moving you and your own personal goals forward. Use a brain dump list to eliminate distractions - you’ll go back to that at the end of the week to help plan the following week! When you have a plan of attack, you don’t have to worry about what comes next or have all of your ideas spiraling in your head - you’re ready to tackle your day.
Avoid Task Switching and Distractions
When focusing on one task at a time and not switching back and forth or getting distracted you are able to accomplish more and feel more productive. You may even be able to knock something off your to-do list. You are actually saving time by not switching from task to task, if it helps, set a timer for focused work, move your cell phone to the other corner of the room, silence notifications on your email. FOCUS! Our brains are not wired to multi-task, finish a task in the allotted time frame before moving on to the next - this is a great place for your brain dump list to come in as well.
Say No
You all know my favorite saying… if you’re saying yes to one thing, ask yourself “what am I saying no to?” Usually it involves something that you want to do or something that is good for you. Choose you because by not choosing you, you increase your stress which carriers over to other relationships and your work. Setting boundaries is healthy and should be practiced everyday. Stay away from over-committing yourself.
Ask for Help - Delegate
This is hard, I know. Admitting you can’t do it all is no fun. But you can’t, you’re just one person. Identify what on your to-do list you can delegate or ask for help with. This can be used at home, in the workplace at school wherever you are… if you volunteered for it and there is just no time, maybe you switch with another parent, it never hurts to ask - odds are, someone will help you out!
Stop Thinking and Start Doing
Once you have a plan of action for the day or the week, you have identified what’s most important, you’ve set some boundaries and asked for help, now it’s time to execute. So often we get stuck in this place of overwhelm that we get stopped in our own tracks. This is probably the most important step because it actually decreases not only what’s on your plate but the stress and overwhelm that comes with it. Thinking and not doing wastes time, start small and get started checking things off of your list.
“What are you going to do this week to get things off your plate?”
